it's May Day.
been slopping around at home.
watched Paris Je'taime and nearly fell asleep at Chapter 13.
basically, i'm really bored and i need company.


i'll just blabber on about how it feels right now.
at this very exact moment?
i'm phlegmatic.
been listening to Crow's Always On Your Side.
the song's pretty depressing.
a mood which i should avoid at all costs at this point of vulnerability.
it could set me off in paranoia and disturb current peace.


i guess i'm just feeling restless la.
need boyfriend to talk to, need him to listen to me, go out with him, have fun.
but he's out with the boys.
it's ok.
seeing him tomorrow night.


what exactly is my problem?
everytime he talks to me, i get angry and irritated.
but when he doesn't talk to me, i get angry and irritated as well.
i'm a victim of my own mood swings.
lately, i don't like being around a group of more than 1.
not that i have violent objections about the presence of my schoolmates, just that i'd rather be alone or one on one with someone.
in simpler terms, i'm very much withdrawn and don't really like the noise right now.


dang.
that song's really getting to me.
i'm going over to the dark side.